La Douleur Exquise Or Pardon My French

" I decided to stop pitying myself. Other than my eye, two things aren't paralyzed,

my imagination and my memory."

Felt Pen 

Take away the distractions and what am I?

Just a frightened little reference to something you can relate to.

When you get to brass tacks you find the log in your eye

and they’ve taken the spring from your step

stopping

at every ledge, place to lean to check the sheen of

Pushed in push pins in your sole &

walking on the heels of every

nice, decent, semi interesting, semi attractive girl who talks to me

or doesn’t.

And then I sit down and wait a year because then I can add

to the bad collection

of needles in my arch
I will see my own idiocy when someone’s coming after me

or at least it seems, whatever my vanity leads me to believe.
And on the days of the week I think

“I don’t want to be so weak, I want to be confident and honest

And sweep them on my feet.”

A stunning girl

I can’t have 
steps into

my home

and I shut up like a clam.

What do I say, with a glass of orange juice in hand?

I wish I could say interesting things.

And the universe, she likes to teach me things

And with each thing I think I’m an ass

Which I am.

Oh, what I am.

La Douleur Exquise, what a wonderful phrase.
Suspicion made certain would let the wide awake lie.

Your shoulder in my hand, with a man,

Could I have done something were the head with the man?

Return, I’ll clean up.
Until then

To sprint around with mason fisted jars

after every pixie & dame

who piques my gaze.
Perks of being a solitary coward

allow me to stare from a distance.

Your dress is so inviting.
Cut off my hands,

You can take them in a box.
to hold every now and then

I’d be luckier than most men. 

Reality

I tell you this,
my sometimes friends,
do not trust words written in pen.
Do not believe the sights you see

Or the things you hear from listening

Do not trust your art

And do not trust your friends

Your loved ones

And acquaintances

Do not trust anyone you can or cannot see

And most important,

Do not trust things said by me.

And even more important,

Do not trust yourself, never ever trust yourself.

For the saying goes, keep your friends close and your enemies closer

And who is closer to you than thee? 

14

We never made it to this day,

On it I felt awkward.

Obliged to meet you at your locker door

Now,

5 months till the day I worry.
I waited with baited breath

As all my school chums go steady

And I pin myself to that indulgent title of “Lonely”
“Little Miss Depression”.
To be pitied, how lovely.
I wanted to be wanted

& left alone.

Sgt.

What a concert of a woman.
Commuters I’ve seen

a dozen on the street

But she’s

A patched burlap green girl

I want to understand what she does

Why she taps her foot to her songs

Is it the same reason I tap mine?
I want to strong arm to the front

For a meet-and-greet

Be impolite to get the best seat,

See front seated be up front

With her & know.
I like when my friends don’t understand

Staring.

Flailing, time signatures

Through hair whose name I have yet to have.

You seem nice

And I hope that’s not the case.
I hope you’re diabolical

And over mint chocolate chip

I can tell you my brave new world.

This used to be a discolored ballad

Let me show you waterworks for colours.

Let’s worry about nothing

and whisper sweet somethings

What is your name?

Infini-tea

Dressed to the toe

So people look

Let them look

Can’t tell if they’re impressed

Hope it turns you on.

All who wonder will lust

This wonder,

Of impending pressure

On a house of discontent

And the dress on your habeas corpus

Let the lost eyes wander until they're caught.

To not be charged till the touch.

Seconds are not choice

But one man’s treasure

Is another man with similar tastes venture.
Captial T, Treason

Any thing less wouldn’t be quite grammatical

Don’t mind my stuttering

It means you've tied my tongue

with the idea of yours. 

My, my, my, my.
It has been quite a long time since I've given you lovelies anything to read.
Well here's 5 relatively new poems.

It's been so long, I have so much to show & tell

Movies, art, poems, music etc. etc. but that's for another night, I am quite sleepy.

We've got a lot of catching up to do

Godspeed,
C.B.